Story Time

Okay kids, give mom and dad that note you forged telling them they had parent/teacher conferences today and mosey on in to Uncle Bloggy's Story Hovel. Grab ol' Uncle B. a cold one out of the fridge and pull up a stool. We've got a special story for you today, all about...well, I'm not sure what it's about yet. I make these things up as I go along. But it's probably all Irishy.

Okay, so once upon a time there was kid. And this kid li...what's that? Did the kid look like you? No, he looked nothing like you. Why would the kid look like you? Anyway this kid lived in a little stone cottage in a little village in Ireland called Ballybloggy. It's where my family comes from as a matter of fact. Now in this town, as in all Irish towns at the the time, there was a witch. A really foul tempered, horrible witch who hated children, especially the particular kid that this story's about. Isn't that handy? So this witch- we'll call her...oh let's see...let's call her Laren- this witch was so mean that she put a spell on the kid in the cottage so that the poor kid could never leave the little stone cottage and if he did, he'd instantly turn into a cheaply made piece of office furniture and...what? It doesn't matter what kind of office furniture. Okay fine, a file cabinet. And if that wasn't bad enough, while the kid was in the cottage his windows didn't work. Out one window he saw everything in black and white and out the other he saw nothing at all. Yes, there were only two windows. Didn't I say it was a small cottage? Pay attention and get me another beer. Anyway, so you can imagine how much this sucked, this whole can't-leave-the-cottage-no-windows thing. Keep in mind there was no TV or Nintendo 64 or cassette tape decks or anything back then. Staring out the window was pretty much the only entertainment kids had back then in once-upon-a-time. So Laren the witch had pretty much ruined everything.

One day, as luck would have it, a magical cow walked by the one window that worked better than the other one. On the cow's back rode a beautiful young Irish dancer and on the cow's curly head sat a crow wearing a hat. The crow tipped his hat and spoke to the poor imprisoned kid. "Don't you love my hat?" says he. "Isn't it the most beautiful color?" The kid just sighed. "I wouldn't know. See a witch put a spell on me and to me it just looks black and white."

"Dude..." said the crow. "I can imagine how much that must suck. Is there anything we can do to help?" The kid thought for a while and then had an idea. "Maybe" he said "if you can get all the children to draw a picture to show me what's outside the other window and color what I see out this window, and take those pictures to the Renewal By Andersen tent at the 2009 Kansas City Irish Fest, maybe just maybe that will break the spell!" "What's a Kansas City Irish Fest?" said the crow.

So children, you can see what you need to do. Click and print the pictures below. Color the one that has the cow, dancer girl and crow on it. On the other one draw what you think that kid would see out the window if not for mean ol' Laren The Witch's nasty spell. Bring them to Irish Fest and take them to the Renewal By Andersen tent. You'll not only help break the spell, but you might also win a prize from the people at Renewal who are much nicer than witches.

So there you go, kids. Get to it. You have just 10 days. Now scram out of the Story Hovel. Uncle Bloggy's soap operas are on.