Spreading The Love, Or Something Like It

You've volunteered for this year's Irish Fest already, and we couldn't be prouder of you. You saw a job that needed doing and you stepped up to the plate and threw that touchdown pass right through the ol' hoop. You're a champion. You're a role model. Your friends however, are losers. You need to get them on the stick. They need to know what you know and join the KCIF pep squad.

I know it can be ticklish. Some of these people haven't heard from you in awhile. Some are still mad about that virus you infected their machines with last time you e-mailed them. And you don't want to be a pest and the right words can be hard to find.

But not today. The right words are right here. Simply copy, paste, fill in the blanks and send off to everybody you've ever known. I think you'll find it will work for everybody on your list. And not only will sending this help out Irish Fest, but you'll also rekindle all sorts of stagnant friendships and failed romances. We all win.

Ready? Go. Thank you.

Hi ____________!

It's me, _________! It's been way to long since I ________ed you! I hope you and your lovely ___________ are doing well, and that the penicillin cleared up that nasty _______________ you had on your ____. Hey, listen, I was just wondering what you were doing Labor Day weekend. Because as you now, that's when the 7th Annual Kansas City Irish Fest takes place at Crown Center. I was reading today on the festival blog (it's written by Dan Regan, one of the festival directors, who writes about as well as an untrained ____________ that's been drinking too much ____________) that they need something like a thousand volunteers for this year. And that they struggle every year to find enough people! Can you imagine? What sort of _____________ wouldn't volunteer to work at Irish Fest? How big a __________ would you have to be to not want to be part of this? Just how far up your ___ ______would your ______ have to be shoved? Seriously! I've already signed up for like __ shifts of course, but then I've always been more ____________ than you. But have you joined the Irish Fest team yet? You really should, even with your recurring ________________ problem. You get a free t-shirt, a free ticket to the fest, entry in the volunteer raffle, free refreshments while you work and the company of some of the ______est people around! You might even get _______ after your shift. Not even you are a big enough____________ enough to pass up an offer like that! Plus, of course, you're helping put on Kansas City's best festival and that's gotta make you feel _____________. And hey, it's super easy to get signed up, too. All you have to do is go the www.kcirishfest.com and click on the "volunteers" page. There's lots of different jobs and shifts available. We can even work together! Awesome!!! This will be as much fun as that time we drove to Mexico and ______________ that ______________ into the ________________, until the ________________ shot the ________________ and we had to ________________ the _________________ at the border and run for it. Man, I've still got cactus spines in my ___________ from that one. Anyway, you go get signed up and let's get together soon to makes plans for Irish Fest. I can't wait to see my favorite band ________________ and drink my weight in _____________until I ___________. And if I run into that Regan _______, I'm going to tell him exactly what I think of him and his ____________ blog. That ______________ing moron.

TTFN! Your BFF (LOL), _______________.