And Sobering News Is The Kind We Don't Like

At our monthly committee meeting last Thursday volunteer coordinator Daneil Armstrong gave us some sobering news: volunteer sign-ups for Irish Fest are down. Down 20% from this time last year. Now I know that you've all been busy driving the kids to their court appointed public service and mowing the house and painting the lawn and whatnot. And I know you'll all come through in the end and won't let us down. But seriously, enough drama. We've got plenty of other things to worry about in these last 66 days without worrying about this.

Remember, we're a 99.9% volunteer run event. Top to bottom we're just like you, doing this work for the love, the fun and the awesome free t-shirts. So let's end the drama. You know you're going to do it. Sign up. Today. Like, now. Please? And for those of you who have already done so, I offer another in a series of helpful e-mails that you can send to your slacker friends. This one is to be sent to your acquaintances of the opposite gender, if you know which one that is.

Fill in the blanks, send away.

Dear_____________,

We’ve been friends for what, _____ years now? Well, I have to confess something. I’ve always had, well, certain feelings for you. I know it’s crazy, but I can’t help it. When I gaze into your __________ I just get this ____________feeling in my _____________. What is it about you that makes my _______________ get so ________________? Though you’re gorgeous and sexy and sensitive and intelligent and I love the way your ___________ moves when you ________________ , I think the thing that makes you so incredibly attractive is the way you’re so giving, caring and thoughtful. For instance, I bet you’ve already volunteered to work at this year’s Kansas City Irish Fest. That is so you, donating your time and talents like that to help KC’s best festival. Just thinking about the way that free volunteer t-shirt fits you makes me tingle like I’ve got a live__________ in my ___________ and it’s trying to get out. Honestly, I think if you weren’t the kind of person who’d volunteer for Irish Fest, I don’t think I’ve ever think about you this way. Then you’d just be another ____________ like _________ __________.

You know, I volunteered to work at Irish Fest too. Maybe since we’re both going to be there, we could get together after our shifts are over, have a cold ____________and some hot _______.

XOXO

Me