There Will Be Blood

I hope you all got what you wanted for Christmas and were able to spend time with all the important people in your life. Speaking of which, a group of some very important people in my life will gather as a group for the final time tomorrow morning at the last meeting of the current board of directors of the Kansas City Irish Fest. Founding director Patti Aylward Kalb will be leaving us as the old year closes and the next time we all get together it will be with newbies Barney Walsh and Laren Mahoney at the Irish Fest board table.

It will be a strange, confusing and often physically and psychologically painful time for Barney and Laren, beginning with the implantation of their tracking micro-chip, which will enable us to find them at any time during Irish Fest weekend. The initiation ceremony will follow, the details of which I can't divulge here, other than to say that ritual scarring and branding irons may be involved. I can also tell you that the ceremony or "boarding" of the two new members will span three days in an undisclosed location, during which the inductees will be deprived of sleep and will eat only corned beef and boiled cabbage. Both Barney and Laren will also be required to wear the Hat Of Shame for the entire month of March, so you'll be able to easily spot them on St. Patrick's Day. Patti, meanwhile will be subjected to a routine memory cleansing surgery to prevent her from spilling any Irish Fest secrets. She also gets a handsome alarm clock.

So please join me in wishing Barney and Laren well as they join us on the board. And be sure to thank Patti for her years of valuable service...though she may give you a blank, vacant, unknowing stare if you thank her after say 1:00 on Thursday. It's the thought that counts.