Milwaukee Report #3: What To Wear to An Irish Fest

My brother Pat once had a great idea. I mean, he's had more than one great idea, 'cause he's a creative guy and a great writer (go buy his most recent book, and you'll see what I mean). But the idea he had that comes to mind was for a book he hasn't gotten around to yet. We were at the now extinct Kansas City Spirit Festival several years ago. Looking around at the people who swarmed over the festival grounds at Liberty Memorial, Patrick had the thought to do a photo book with pictures of some of the more colorful characters there. No captions, just the pictures. The book's title would sum it all up: "What Were You Thinking?".

I could have done a lengthy chapter in Milwaukee, where with weekend crowds topping 130,000, the people watching is almost as much fun as the music listening. The guy wearing the giant foam shamrock hat with Guinness cans hanging all around the perimeter like fat black aluminum lace, who I swear was standing at the same beer tent all day, every time I walked past. The fella, easily 70 years old, dressed in what appeared to be white shamrock covered pajamas and a lime green cap. An army of 300 pound men, bellys hanging over their plaid skirts. Yeah, yeah, okay it's a "kilt"...semantics. The woman, on her hands and knees trying hard not to lose all that beer she'd invested in, wearing, and I'm not making this up, a t-shirt that said "Lush Of The Irish". The staggering frat boy in a three foot tall hat shaped like a pint of Guinness wearing a stained t-shirt that said on the front "Stop Looking At My Shirt" and on the back "Kiss Me, I'm S**tfaced". Wonder if that worked for him.

I of course was tastefully attired in my Kansas City Irish Fest cap, my Kansas City Irish Fest shirt, my Kansas City Irish Fest jacket, my Kansas City Irish Fest face painting, my Kansas City Irish Fest giant green afro wig and my bright green Kansas City Irish Fest knickers.

Style is my middle name.